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    October 11

    杂事

     
         近日夜里睡得很不安稳,不是失眠,就是做梦。身子还是很虚弱,喝完10多剂疗理脚的无敌苦的中药后,又要继续煲调理身体的中药。唉,百般无奈,但又不可不喝。他们都说我脸色苍白、没血色,自己也发觉憔悴多了……
     
         尽管身体不适,但我还是继续当夜精灵,游荡在寂寥的黑夜。依然改掉不了“熬夜”的坏习惯,依然拿自己的青春奢侈挥霍,依然不会好好照顾自己……外弱内刚、倔强的女子,我也拿自己没办法了!
     
         一如既往地听着那些伤感的音乐,“以毒攻毒”,借他们歇斯底里的呐喊来疗伤。像上瘾的毒药,一发不可收拾。不是为了把自己淹没在伤痛中,而是为了刺激那些沉醉于海市蜃楼幻想般的细胞,寻找那份遗失的美好。
     
        习惯了夜里农家的狗吠声,习惯了楼下出世不久的可爱的小BB的哭声,习惯了陪我疯癫的主机里风扇“呼呼”的转动声……轻轻的,我把自己定格在黑夜的某个角落,重温着孩时“灰姑娘与王子”的童话故事,让体内不可负载的液体慢慢流出,任凭它胡乱的践踏我的容妆……
     
        多愁善感的我该学会把“胡思乱想”丢掉,重拾“笑容可掬”,坚强地勇敢地走下去……
     

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